A man is walking along a beach

A man is walking along a beach and finds a bottle. When he rubs the bottle, a genie appears and says, "I can grant you one wish." "Well," says the man, "I have never been too fond of flying, so could you make a highway from California to Hawaii?" The genie says, "Do you know how much of my power that would take?" The man says, "Okay, I have never really gotten girls, so could you make that happen?" The genie says, "You want that highway two lane or four lane?"

Average: 7.3 (3 votes)
Category

Another 5 random jokes

Catching mice

A man knocks on a lady's door and said 'i'm terribly sorry miss but i ran over your cat,. because i'm responsible of its death i would like to replace your cat ' and the lady said ' thank You so how are you at you at catching mice then?'

Average: 7 (1 vote)
Category
Tags

A true story

This is the true story of George Phillips of Meridian, Mississippi, who was going to bed when his wife told him that he'd left the light on in the shed. George opened the door to go turn off the light but saw there were people in the shed in the process of stealing things.

He immediately phoned the police, who asked, "Is someone in your house?" and George said, "No," and explained the situation. Then they explained that all patrols were busy, and that he should simply lock his door and an officer would be there when available.

George said, "Okay," hung up, counted to 30, and phoned the police again.

"Hello, I just called you a few seconds ago because there were people in my shed. Well, you don't have to worry about them now because I've just shot them all."

Then he hung up. Within five minutes three squad cars, an Armed Response unit, and an ambulance showed up. Of course, the police caught the burglars red-handed.

One of the policemen said to George, "I thought you said that you'd shot them!"

George said, "I thought you said there was nobody available!"

Average: 7 (2 votes)
Category
Tags

Animal tracks

Three blondes girls were walking in the woods and came upon tracks. The first one said, "Look, it's deer tracks." The second one said, "No, it's wolf tracks" and before the third one could answer, they got hit by a train.

Average: 6.5 (2 votes)
Category
Tags

Brain transplant

I wasn't originally going to get a brain transplant, but then I changed my mind.

Average: 6.5 (2 votes)
Category

Understand?

If you understand English, press 1. If you do not understand English, press 2. Recording on an Australian tax help line

Average: 6.5 (2 votes)
Category