Jokes for Children

All jokes for children on jokes-for-us.com (page 1). In total there are 165 jokes for children on the site. The jokes are ordered according to the score that visitors have given to a joke. Help with the site and also give a good or bad score to the jokes you read.

Note: if you click on tags you can get jokes with adult content.

How to replace a cat

A woman answered the doorbell with a man standing on her porch. The man said, "I'm terribly sorry. I just ran over your cat and I would like to replace it for you." The woman replied, "Well that's alright with me, but how are you at catching mice?"

Average: 9 (1 vote)
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Am I pretty or ugly?

Girlfriend: "Am I pretty or ugly?"
Boyfriend: "You're both."
Girlfriend: "What do you mean?"
Boyfriend: "You're pretty ugly."

Average: 9 (1 vote)
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Talking parrot

A man goes to a pet shop and buys a talking parrot. He takes the parrot home and tries to teach the parrot how to say a few things, but instead, the parrot just swears at him. After a few hours of trying to teach the bird, the man finally says, "If you don't stop swearing, I'm going to put you in the freezer as punishment." The parrot continues, so finally the man puts the bird in the freezer. About an hour later, the parrot asks the man to please open the door. As the man takes the shivering bird out of the freezer, it says, "I promise to never swear again. Just tell me what that turkey did!"

Average: 9 (1 vote)
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Breakfast

What do cats eat for breakfast?

Answer
Average: 8 (1 vote)
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Grape

What did the grape do when he got stepped on? He let out a little wine.

Average: 7 (2 votes)
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Buzzing

“Doctor, I keep seeing an insect buzzing around me.” “Don’t worry; that’s just a bug that’s going around.”

Average: 7 (2 votes)
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Gaps in your teeth

You have so many gaps in your teeth, it looks like your tongue is in jail.

Average: 6.5 (2 votes)
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On the street

How to be Insulting in the Street: Walk along as if you have stepped in something unpleasant, by pretending to scrape your feet along the pavement, or rubbing your soles on any available patches of grass. Then look daggers at anyone walking a dog.

Average: 8 (2 votes)
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